One Day at a Time

The theme of my life this year has been Dying to Self.  A year ago, my husband's cancer was declared returned, and I had a decision to make.  Looking at the whole journey ahead of me was too overwhelming, so I took the advice of my dad and looked at only one day at a time.  Looking at one day at a time allowed me to enjoy little moments with K, to laugh, to do my job well, and most importantly, to serve my husband.  Being a solo parent and caregiver while working full-time is a daunting task.  I won't lie, there were moments when I didn't think I could make it another day.  There were several moments that I was strongly tempted to feel sorry for myself and have a pity party.  At times I gave in and grumbled to myself, then changed perspective, pasted on a smile and a calm voice and asked if there was anything else I could do to serve.  I know my husband appreciates it and I try to keep the perspective that I have no idea what he truly feels like and what he's had to go through.  God is able to give me strength moment by moment, day by day, and only with his help and presence have I been able to keep going.

One Day at a Time:
Laundry
Grocery Shopping
Cooking
Playing with K
Teaching 5th graders every week day
Cleaning
Packing to move
Playing with K
Bedtime Ritual
Nursing, Serving, & Cleaning up after sick Spouse
Traveling every weekend for 4-6 week stretches of hospitalizations
Playing with K

If I found myself starting to think of the overwhelming amount of things I needed to do in a week, I made myself stop and look at the one thing I could do then.  A little each day and it got done.  And time with K was more important than the rest.

I must say that playing with my baby was/is the highlight of my world.  I get to take him to swim lessons on Saturday mornings right now and that is a ton of fun!  Making him drown proof (I hope).  He just turned two and as always is mine and Bo's joy.  I do look forward to the day when I might have a partner in parenting and life, but until then, I'm grateful for the many blessings God has given me and the constant help He is to me each day, moment by moment.  AND I'm ever grateful I still HAVE my spouse! (His last bonemarrow showed no Leukemia...praying it stays that way...now for the health and strength to return)

"I need thee every hour, Oh Precious God my Savior..." ~ Old Hymn